It is absolutely possible to soulbond without knowing it, and in fact
its very normal and natural for many people it occurs to. For me, and
those that I discovered soulbonding with, it was just something that
happened to us spontaneously, that we struggled to understand.
Many people are natural soulbonders, and find that people/characters just pop into (and out of) their minds without their own effort (or even consent).
One of the most common ways that people first discover that they have soulbonds is through writing.Writing establishes a connection between you, and a character in another world that allows the bond to form.
Writers who get particularly close to their characters often discover one day that a particular character will no longer ‘listen’ to them, and do what they want on the page. Rather, the character has a will of their own, and the agency to express that will. This can be the beginning of a soulbond, especially if the author then discovers that the character will actually argue/communicate back to them.
Roleplayers tend to be very susceptible to this as well, and sometimes will find that the soulbond has ‘fronted’ without them knowing, leaving them somewhat out of control of their own bodies, and shunted to the back of their minds.
The advice I would give someone looking to become a soulbonder is this:
one character, a character who resonates with you, and you have a lot
of feelings for. Not a character necessarily that you think is a lot
like yourself, but a character you admire for their strength, or
sympathize with for their problems. Essentially a character that you
have strong “feels” for.
- Ruminate on that character. Try to
‘get to know’ them as deeply as possible. View/read/listen to all their
source material, and any fanfiction that speaks to you as ‘true to
character’. Collect pictures of them. Do anything that keeps your mind
focused on them, as if calling out to them. Keep the character in your
mind during the day, maintain your feelings for them.
during the day (in your mind) what would X do? What would X want?
(Getting ice cream? ask them what flavor they want. Having difficulty
with something? ask what they would do)
- Eventually if
you’ve established a bond, they will answer back from the back of your
mind. It may be faint at first, and you may be inclined to dismiss it as
you pretending, but don’t do that. Keep asking questions and talking
back when you receive an answer. This will strengthen the bond.
way to do this would be to do it on paper instead of your mind. Write a
scene with you and the character, as descriptive and detailed as you
can make it, and write a conversation back and forth between you.
Eventually, if you’ve established a bond, you’ll start to ‘hear’ their
answers before you write them.
- If none of this works after a
while, pick a different character. It may be that the character you’ve
been focused on just isn’t receptive/isn’t the right bond for you right
The number one key to soulbonding is to be in tune with your inner mind, and to listen! sometimes you will be surprised and the soulbond who turns up will not be the one you are expecting. But I guarantee they will be the one you need.